The Atlantic Bends the Space-Time Continuum With Piece on Trump and Biden’s Statements

When it comes to just how bad the mainstream press is, nothing surprises me anymore. No matter the subject, I fully expect the major players to deliver the dumbest, most counterfactual takes imaginable. That’s been recently illustrated by outlets continuing to parrot Hamas as a legitimate source for casualty figures in Gaza. 

Do these “journalists” live in some alter universe, or are they just incredibly dishonest? The answer is probably both, though I’m not sure it even matters. The bad takes will continue until morale improves, and we’re all out of morale. 

Enter Brian Klaas of The Atlantic with one of the hottest takes of the year. 

These deranged rants are tempting to laugh off. They’re par for the course. Trump is Trump. But Trump may also soon be the president of the United States. Imagine the response if Joe Biden had made the same rambling remarks, word for word. Consider this excerpt:
“I say, ‘What would happen if the boat sank from its weight and you’re in the boat and you have this tremendously powerful battery and the battery’s underwater, and there’s a shark that’s approximately 10 yards over there?’ By the way, a lot of shark attacks lately. Do you notice that? A lot of shark … I watched some guys justifying it today: ‘Well, they weren’t really that angry. They bit off the young lady’s leg because of the fact that they were not hungry, but they misunderstood who she was.’ These people are crazy.”

I’ll admit to not being familiar with Trump’s recent commentary on sharks so I looked it up. You see that “…” in the above excerpt? That means The Atlantic cut out part of the quote. Why did they do that? Because when you read what Trump said in context, he was clearly joking. 

“It must be because of M.I.T., my relationship with M.I.T., very smart. I say, ‘What would happen if the boat sank from its weight and you’re in the boat and you have this tremendously powerful battery, and the battery is now underwater, and there’s a shark that’s approximately 10 yards over there?” Trump said. “By the way, lot of shark attacks lately. Did you notice that?”
He described asking the boat manufacturer if, in the hypothetical scenario, he should get electrocuted or jump near the shark.
“I’ll take electrocution every single time,” Trump said. “I’m not getting near the shark.”

Trump’s rallies are essentially stand-up routines. Whether one finds them funny or not isn’t the point. The point is that when he starts talking about not getting near sharks to the laughter of the crowd, that’s called a “joke.” He’s not actually worried about having to choose between electrocution and being eaten by a shark. I’m not much for playing Trump interpreter, but come on.

Regardless, the big issue with The Atlantic’s piece isn’t its predictable shots at the Republican nominee. It’s this assertion: 

By contrast, when Biden makes a gaffe—mixing up a name or a date rather than, for example, suggesting that boats sink because they’re heavy—questions arise about his mental fitness to be president. A president who occasionally misspeaks is far less worrying than one who purveys delusional fantasies and conspiracy theories. Biden may gaffe, but he lives in reality; Trump often doesn’t.

“Biden may gaffe, but he lives in reality,” the article proclaims. To that, I offer the following presentation of storytime with Bonchie. 

In December of 2022, Joe Biden appeared in New Castle, Delaware, to speak at an event for veterans. As he wandered the stage, the president recounted a tear-jerking story of awarding his “Uncle Frank” a Purple Heart while serving as vice president. He described an intimate family ceremony at his home to present the award for wounds suffered during the Battle of the Bulge.

According to Biden, “Uncle Frank” was so touched by the moment that he delivered a line about how he didn’t deserve the honor because so many others had died in battle. 

The problem? “Uncle Frank” had been dead since 1999. 

SEE: Biden Makes Up a Story About Awarding a Purple Heart, and It Just Gets Worse From There

Now, would Brian Klaas like to rethink the claim that Biden “lives in reality?” Because if not, I’ve got quite a few more examples to offer. For example, the president has repeatedly told a lie in which an Amtrak conductor supposedly congratulated him while vice president for traveling more than a million miles. The conductor in question retired in 1993. 

In another instance, Biden once searched a room, calling out for a congresswoman to recognize her. Why is that an issue? Because she had died a month prior in a car accident. But Biden “lives in reality,” according to The Atlantic.

I could keep going, but I’d be here all night if I gave every example of the president completely making up some random story about his life. Remember “Corn Pop” or his repeated claim that he taught as a professor for four years? The president has also asserted that he marched during the Civil Rights movement, and that he was a truck driver at one point. None of it is true. 

Whatever one thinks of Trump and his rally speeches, to try to claim he’s somehow out of it but that Biden is firmly grounded is insane. To do so is to take every piece of evidence that exists and cast it into the outer regions. That Klaas was able to finish his article without feeling immense shame says nothing good about him or his outlet.

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